Monday, July 17, 2006

Perspective

Gotta love the Hubble. Pics like this one remind me of how gorgeous the universe is. Not to mention the enormity of it all. Good to help me keep things in perspective when I'm stressing over stupid shit.

What kind of stupid shit? Well, I'll tell you. Rewrote the first three and a half pages of my wip. Three and a half down, approx. 300 more to go. Added a character that now has to be threaded into the rest of the story. More sound here, a little more texture there, do I really need this section? Nope. Repetitive. Etc., etc., etc. That kind of stupid shit. So yep, it's good to remember that when you step back far enough, just about everything looks better!

I'm not big on jokes, but I really liked these. Nice to see folks doing a good job with a good sense of humor.


After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet,"which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems; document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' Pilots (marked with a P) and the Solutions Recorded (marked with an S) By Maintenance Engineers.

By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.


-----------------------------------------------------------------------

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Auto pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievab ly loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And The Best One For Last !!

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel . Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget

7 Comments:

At 12:48 PM, Blogger Bill Cameron said...

Never leave a hammer in the hands of a midget inside an instrument panel!

 
At 8:43 AM, Blogger M.E Ellis said...

Oh! I love the galaxies and stars and planets and and and...

I have a large telescope and was able to view Mars a couple of years back. Absolutely stunning, yet frightening too. The moon looks freaky close up, made my tummy flutter but at the same time it was lovely.

I found a star once, looked white in the sky, but through my telescope was yellow, red and purple. Absolutely amazing. It wasn't just 'one' star either, like it appeared in the sky, but a whole cluster.

I might just have to get my telescope out again!

:o)

 
At 8:43 AM, Blogger M.E Ellis said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 8:44 AM, Blogger M.E Ellis said...

That was my deletion above. Blogger double posted.

:o)

 
At 2:28 PM, Blogger M. G. Tarquini said...

These had me laughing out loud.

 
At 6:48 PM, Blogger Amra Pajalic said...

I could not stop laughing. The midget one was great. Although love the live bugs on order too.

 
At 10:43 PM, Blogger Elizabeth said...

These people fix our airplanes. This doesn't scare you?

 

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